Home » Good Days » Apparently, My Ass Blocks Traffic

Apparently, My Ass Blocks Traffic

This past week was great!  Seriously, it has been a really long time since I had a week that was so productive.  Even work wasn’t as bad as usual (just jinxed that for this week, I’m sure) which was a bonus.  I have been right on schedule with my marathon training  and I attended two nights of a swim clinic this past week.  As good of a swimmer as I am, I still took so much from this clinic.  When I train, I usually just swim laps…intervals, tempo, different strokes etc, but I never really learned any specific drills to improve my speed and endurance until last week.  I even spent some time being social and went to dinner with an old friend.  She is also into running and we have reconnected recently.  She was an acquaintance in high school but over the last few months we have become good friends and it was so nice to relax with some drinks and just catch up.

This weekend of course flew by again!  I caught up on stuff around the house all day Friday and then stayed at my parents house that night.  Since I was going to be at my parents, I held off on my morning run so I could run the river by their house.  They still live in the town I grew up in, which will always be home and the river is still one of my favorite places to run!  On Saturday, I spent the day with my Mom.  We went to breakfast, farmers markets, got pedicures, went shopping and got lunch. 🙂  I pretty much love mommy-daughter days!  Saturday night I just hung around my house, watched some pointless TV and relaxed.

This morning I woke up and got dressed for my run.  Then I got undressed and went back to bed.  I was overtired and just didn’t have it in me.  I ended up resting/sleeping for two more hours and when I got out of bed I felt so refreshed.  After I finally rolled out of bed, I made an awesome fruit salad for breakfast with all the goodies I got at the farmers market yesterday morning.  It was super yummy!  Then, I spent the day at the Jersey Shore 🙂  One of my teammates has a place in Ocean City for a week and invited us down for food, beach and drinks.  I, of course, indulged in all three.  It was a great day to be downtheshore and I hated having to come home!

Since I had pinkie promised myself this morning when I ditched my run that I would make it up tonight, I immediately got dressed when I got home from the beach.  Had I done anything else first, I knew I would never actually run.  I decided on an out and back route from my house and was on my way. I had a fabulous run!  It is runs like that, that make all the training worth it.  It is what gets you from one run to the next.  It is what gets you over the bad runs.  There is nothing like a great run…short or long, slow or fast…a great run is a great run!

While I was on my run I had the most bizarre encounter:

About .5 into the route I have to cross a major highway.  Since it is a busy intersection I always turn my IPOD off while I am waiting to cross.   As I am standing on the sidewalk next to the street, waiting to cross, a convertible approaches.  What happened next still has me laughing to myself.

The Over-Made Up Girl in Car: “Your ass is blocking the traffic!”

Me: (look over kinda of with a WTF face)

The Over-Made Up Girl in Car: “Moooooooooooooovvvvveeeeeee”

Me: (still looking with a WTF face)

As this was happening her totally mortified boyfriend who was driving puts the top up on his convertible.  News flash- I can still see your asshole girlfriend even with the top up.  Since it was obvious that the closest this girl ever came to sweating/running was when she went as Work-Out Barbie for Halloween, I just shrugged, ignored her and laughed as I crossed the road and kept on running.  Perhaps she should pay less attention to my ass and more attention to fixing her awful make-up lines.

I would like to point out, that while it might be true that for my little self, I do have a fairly big ass…it does not block traffic.  Maybe I should let you decide for yourself….

bigbutTraffic blocker????

Do you have a similar story?  I remember reading  one from JILLWILLRUN about boys who told her she had that “Boom Boom Pow” which totally cracked me up.  What is the funniest/rudest/oddest thing ever said to you on a run?

9 thoughts on “Apparently, My Ass Blocks Traffic

  1. Ass blocking traffic? That girl has some issues… probably some anger issues, but she apparently has some trouble with spatial relations too!

    And AMEN to the “a great run is a great run” no matter what distance. It’s all about what you personally get from the run. Glad you were able to get in a great run AND some rest.

  2. Doesn’t “Work Out Barbie” do the “30 Second Workout?”

    That ass doesn’t even qualify for “back” – sorry, baby ain’t got no back…

  3. Sounds like a gret week. I really need to look in to a swimming clinic. I could definitley use some pointers.

    I don’t know why people have to make such stupid comments.

  4. LMFAO! OMG you shoulda did a shimmey dance for her or something! LOL! People are ridiculous!

    As for having a great run, Congrats! I totally agree with you, if it weren’t for those good runs we’d never make it past the bad ones!

  5. Puh-lease! Your ass does not move traffic, I think that barbie biotch has a sight problem. I bet that your badonk-a-donk could out perform her’s in any form of exercise.

    I haven’t had any funny stories such as yours – yet – but I do remember in 6th grade on field day while I was running a relay race (with parents and teachers present), one of my classmates yelled out “Run Pam Anderson, run!” Obviously I was an early bloomer and was a bit chesty for most my life until I lost weight and everything evened out.

  6. Oh! That bitch is jealous! And how rude!!!! I love it that you heard it all.

    I had one incident which didn’t happen when I was running, but is related to running because I toned up because of it. This one guy friend whom I haven’t seen for a few months runs into me at a bar, and just goes, really, really, really loud: “Woooooow, Ulyana, have you lost…. (a long pause)…. aaaaa loooooooooooot of weeeeeeight?????” Uh, I just looked at him completely speechless… and so did a few girls around us. I wanted to ask “how fat did I look???” espcially since, no, technically, I hadn’t lost a pound, but at the moment I didn’t find it as funny as I do now.

    And another one came from my coach’s husband – who is also a coach, but I never liked him b/c he was never exactly PC. He’d always refer to me and this one guy I’d run with as “two fat friends”, and one time, he went “whooooooooooaaaaaaaaa, your thighs are so huge!”. No comment. Needless to say, I avoid him.

  7. First of all, that is a horrible picture lol

    Secondly, you have a lovely skaters butt. You are so not a fat ass but Barbie is quite the fat head.

    I want to run her over…

  8. OMG Ulyana!!!! I have had my fair share so I understand; still awful though!!

    Mom…can you believe I had the guts to post this awfulness…it might be the worst picture ever!!!

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