Home » Random » Top Searches- AKA, People Google Weird Things

Top Searches- AKA, People Google Weird Things

Over the last (almost) two years that I have had this blog, I have kept track of the search terms people use wherein my blog appears.  And people google the most bizzarre things!  I get a lot of normal searches that make sense, like “running”, “yurbuds”, “races”, “triathlon”, “swimming”, “fresh start” and of course any combination of the words “finishing” and “winning” but then there are the phrases like the ones below that just make me scratch my head. 

“Obstacles getting to Ohio”- Funny, I have never been to Ohio.  Moreover, I am trying to figure out if I even know anyone who lives in Ohio!  And I am curious as to what obstacles a person would have attempting to travel there. I should know because I do want to get to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame one day!

“There are three things on the table”- Something tells me the person who did this search was NOT looking for a triathlon blog!

“I am super speedy”- I feel sorry for this person looking in the way wrong place.  You want speedy you are going to have to click on over to Joe, Lindsay, Denise, Keri or Aron.  Me slow; them speedy!

“Scuba woman extrodinare”- I am a woman of many extrodinary things but scuba diving is not one of them. 

 “Congratulations New Year pig”- I actually laughed out loud for real when I read this.  There are so many different ways to interperet this phrase depending on commas and inflections but they are all funny.  I feel like this is the kick in the ass I could have used at the start of 2011 to get back to the gym!

“One beer too many”- Considering I just recently drank my first beer in over 10 years the other night, I have no idea how this got someone to my blog.  I think perhaps they were looking for the Last Mile Lounge.

“Running pregnant in a horror film”- I have never been pregnant or in a horror film. But I run, so I have that going for me.

“Results for martini drinkers”- Yes, martini drinkers can run and race triathlon too!  I am proof of such statements.  I just don’t recommend mixing martinis with shots of jager and a few too many washington apple shots on a race weekend.  Results might include puking on the side of the road.  Just saying.

“Mike M. such a douchebag”- I promise with my whole heart and soul that I NEVER EVER called you a douchebag, Mike.  Ever. Swear.

“Is there a height requirement for Warrior Dash?”- Clearly not since I was able to participate.  Wonder if they saw my photos and signed up? 

“Cartwheels in the pool are fun”- I would have went with “cartwheels in the pool are impossible” but then what do I know, I just give swimming advice. 

“Why do southerners misuse the word Toboggan?”- Do they?  Here’s the thing though…I don’t think I have ever used the word toboggan in my life.  I don’t even know for what reason I would ever have to reference a toboggan.  And in what way could this word be misused?  Ahh…life’s greatest questions!

“What do you mail a noodleini for?”- I had to google noodleini myself for this one.  Which clearly means I never talked about it in this blog.  For those of you who don’t know, Noodleini is a race in Wisconsin.  At the end of the race you eat noodles.  I definitely never heard of this race before but I dig the word noodleini.  Course, it doesn’t answer how you would mail one…mail a race…I mean, huh?

I am curious- when someone does a search, it goes through a blogs comments as well?  Cause that would explain the Noodleini for sure…and the toboggan thing.   And maybe even why Mike M. is a douchebag!

What are some of the funny things people have searched your blog for?

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16 thoughts on “Top Searches- AKA, People Google Weird Things

  1. i don’t even know what to say in my comment. they are all great!! i haven’t done this but i might need to. would love to see how people are finding me.

  2. Those are a riot! I can’t believe you don’t do cartwheels in the pool…what’s wrong with you?

    btw, I have google analytics yet I don’t know how to find these odd searches. I’m sure there’s one out there: Jill from Colorado is a dork!

  3. These are hilarious. Especially your remarks. I love random search terms. Sometimes I try to google randomass things to see if anyone’s blog shows up but I am never successful.

    I assume they mean “misuse” toboggan because sometimes we also use it regarding the beanie-style hats. Just a guess. Apparently that’s a sin.

  4. Yep, the search crawlers go through comments too (thus the reason comment spam exists… just trying to get their site in search results more). But I’m always amazed to see the things people have used to land on my blog… so weird!

  5. haha. Love this! I just looked through mine today but there are very few and they weren’t too amusing. Also, it was me who mentioned the “misuse” of the word toboggan in your comments. It can totally be a hat! I am glad that Lindsay agrees with me!

  6. What the F was that SEARCH about?
    Ha!
    While I get some weird searches, I’m actually proud of the searches that really do yield helpful information for that random person fumbling through the Internet.
    Hell. That’s what we all once were.

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