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I haven often said I had many reasons for taking a blog break.  The truth is, with so much going on, I just couldn’t write.  I really didn’t have anything good to talk about and I was feeling so down.  It has been a rough couple of months- BUT- I am finally feeling on the upswing and ready to dive back into life!  Here are some updates to clue you in and give you an idea of why things were so tough!

Foot- my foot is actually finally (FINALLY!) starting to feel better!  This has taken way longer than I would have liked and even though I still don’t think/feel 100%, I am happy to report that it does feel good after a long walk or short run.  I have been running with my softball girls and on my own a few miles a week.  It’s been hard starting over and I am frustrated much of the time.  People told me I would bounce right back and I expected too, but I didn’t.  This is honestly like starting over from day one again.  I don’t love running right now, but I remember how much better my life was when I did, so I am hoping to get back to that real soon.

Work- my job is still awesome.  It is the one thing I could count on when everything else was falling apart.  It really is hard to be in a bad mood when I work at a place so beautiful.  The job comes with the same stresses as many jobs, but there is also so much good to even some of those stresses out.  Additionally, I have been coaching softball and even though it makes for long days, I absolutely love it.  The girls have come so far since the first practice and we have a 5-2 record so far!  That is really exciting given that I have 5 girls who never played before and because of injuries I only have 11 girls on my team.  They have really stepped up to the plate (no pun intended) and have made me really proud!

Right now, on top of the day to day work and softball, it is insanely busy with end of the year stuff.  But at least my days fly by.  Tonight is the 8th grade dance and in the month of May we also have the overnight 8th grade trip, a field day and a community service day.  We are about 5 weeks from graduation.  I love these kids but I am definitely ready for summer!

House Hunting- I moved.  Again.  My roommate was CRAZY with a capital C and I couldn’t take it anymore.  Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t like when people leave their shit in the toilet, leave food stuck on pots/plates in the kitchen sink and don’t take the trash out for 4 weeks.  I am also not a fan of her naked boyfriend running around my living room.  Gross disrespectful pig.  Yes, I just publically blasted her.  And I am being nice.

Anyway, I am now house hunting and although the prospect of buying is super scary, this is also a very exciting time.  I have been looking for a little over a month.  I have found some places I love and some that I don’t so much love, haha, but it really has been fun.  My goal is be a homeowner by the fall so fingers crossed!

R2– in the weeks that followed my marathon, as I  tried to come to terms with a broken foot, I was hit with a huge blow.  R2 broke up with me.  It was devastating to say the least.  And I had no outlet.  I felt like my training contributed to some of the problems…but I really had no idea he would just up and call it quits either.  Especially since my race was over and life was going to get a lot calmer.  R2 gave up a lot for my training-  my training didn’t affect just me.  He gave up late nights, opportunities for group dates and other things as well.  He stood by me through all the training…he was with me every step of the way.  If you could have seen his face when he saw me during the race.  He was so proud.  I just couldn’t see how it all could end.  Or why.  All I wanted to do was disappear from the world- swim some laps, run the roads for miles…and I couldn’t.  I had a broken foot and a broken heart.

You may be wondering what happened.  I would tell you, but I am still wondering what happened.  One of the hardest things about the break-up, was that nothing actually happened.  At the end of the day, I can only be the best person I know how to be and if someone doesn’t want to be with me, there is nothing I could/can do about that.  Nothing.  And despite the fact that we tried to maintain the friendship, I was still finding myself often wondering what happened and looking for closure.  I came to realize that it is a closure I will never get.  I have to find it myself.  And I can’t be friends with him in the process.  R2 is a good guy, and you won’t find me trashing him here…but for right now, the best place for him to be is out of my life.

Training- you could hardly call what I am doing training.  Seriously. It’s rather pathetic.  But, I do have a half marathon in August and since I am basically starting over with my running, it is time to get back on a training plan.  What I want most is to get toned again.  I really liked the way I looked last year and between my foot, the break-up, the move and other variables, I really just let myself go.  It is due time to get back on track with my eating, my training and my life!

13 thoughts on “Updates…

  1. Starting over is tough, there’s no doubt about that. Especially when starting over was not really in the plans. That being said, you’re taking those steps again, and within a couple of months I would wager that you’ll make amazing progress.

    Have an amazing day !

  2. Looking forward to your posts. I can’t wait to be starting over with running (that means be able to run again.)

  3. Good Luck with the house hunt! Exciting for sure! Good riddance for the crazy room mate and a guy who obviously couldn’t quite appreciate you for all that you are! Its tough to balance life when training, but I believe finding the right guy makes a world of difference. Hang in there and don’t worry someone truly great will come along!!

  4. Sorry you went through some rough stuff – hope things continue to get better for you. Sounds like you have a lot of positive, exciting things going on in your life right now. 🙂

  5. That is a tough couple of months! 😦 But I love hearing about how great work is and your passion in coaching! I hope your find a new place soon.

    You are being so sensible with what happened with R2. I bet you were shocked, and it shows a lot of maturity that you are just trying to find closure on your own. <– that may make more sense in my head that written out, but I mean it as a compliment, lol 🙂

  6. You sure had a few rough months. But I’m glad not everything was bad and that your work still gives you joy in the middle of all the pain and sorrow you had to go through.

    You’ll have time to be ready in August, just take it easy.

    I’m glad you are back though.

  7. lots going on…but you’re pulling through, like always. chin up!! things will get better…and there’s someone better suited for you out there.

  8. It sounds like a tough few months. I’m glad that things are starting to turn around. It will be nice to have you back here blogging!

  9. it’s good to see you post again! i’ve been wondering how it’s been going. i think we all have those rough times in our lives (mine lasted four years, and even still it’s not all rainbows and unicorns, but it’s better). hang in there, you’ll be back at running soon. one day it will click again and will feel great. exciting about the house. good luck!

  10. I hope the house thing is going well?!? It was so amazing to see you – I’m just sorry it wasn’t for longer! But oh how those ~45 min flew by 🙂

  11. Very mature writeup of your breakup – it can be so hard to write that stuff in a public forum and you sound like you’re approaching it from the best possible angle and with a calm and cool head. Glad you are on the up swing!

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